 While we rarely know them personally, we often feel profound sadness when a celebrity dies. Grief experts say this sorrow is often tied to the influence these famous people can have on us, a connection to our memories of the past, or pervasive media coverage. These are people whose activities, opinions, and actions often spilled into our own lives, and we feel the loss when they are gone. Celebrities also exert an influence through death. Many in the industry believe that David Bowie changed the course of U.K. funeral tradition by choosing direct cremation, demonstrating that it can be a challenge for death care professionals to encourage families to memorialize when their favorite stars don’t. And yet, people seem to know instinctively that memorials are important. Although many celebrities insist they want “no fuss” when they die, post-cremation memorial services in their honor are common. The fans themselves refuse to let the famous person’s death pass unmarked, often sharing meaningful tributes online or spontaneously leaving a mass of flowers in a location that has a particular connection to the person who died. For this end-of-year post, we decided to look at a few notable celebrities who died this year and chose cremation for their disposition. carol channingJANUARY 31, 1921 – JANUARY 15, 2019  As a performer, Carol Channing is difficult to classify. She experienced 70-plus years of celebrity, and the description “entertainer” comes the closest to encompassing her decades of work as an actress on stage and screen, a singer, a book subject, a comedienne, and more. Carol had many ideas for her final resting place and envisioned a service as large as the life she lived. She wanted to be buried between the Curran and Geary theaters in San Francisco, with a “full-scale parade down Geary Street.” She was cremated and returned to her loved ones, perhaps to be scattered from the Golden Gate Bridge (another idea of hers). mary oliverSEPTEMBER 10, 1935 – JANUARY 17, 2019  Mary Oliver was named “this country's best-selling poet” by The New York Times. Winner of the National Book Award and the Pulitzer Prize, many people marked her death earlier this year by sharing Mary’s poetry on life, love, grief, and nature. While we are unable to provide details on her exact form of disposition, in 2005 Mary herself scattered the cremated remains of her longtime partner, Molly Malone Cook, mixed with leaves and petals. Her poem “Prayer” suggests she would prefer a similar experience for herself: Prayer May I never not be frisky, May I never not be risque. May my ashes, when you have them, friend, and give them to the ocean leap in the froth of the waves, still loving movement, still ready, beyond all else, to dance for the world. Evidence: Poems by Mary Oliver karl lagerfeldSEPTEMBER 10, 1933 – FEBRUARY 19, 2019  Karl Lagerfeld held the creative reins of the French luxury fashion houses Chanel and Fendi, as well as his own clothing label. Revered for his style and vision, one might assume that the pomp of the fashion world would permeate his funeral service. On the contrary, he told an interviewer that he’d “rather die than be buried,” and asked for no public funeral. However, his stores were given instructions on how he wanted to be remembered: white roses with 120 cm stems in a transparent or white vase. His cremation took place as a private ceremony among his nearest loved ones, and his cremated remains are believed to have been combined and scattered with those of his mother, Elisabeth, his cat, Choupette, and his longtime partner, Jacques de Bascher. The fashion world honored his life and career with a memorial event titled "Karl For Ever” as part of Paris Men’s Fashion Week in summer 2019 with an invite-only guest list of 2,500. doris dayAPRIL 3, 1922 – MAY 13, 2019  Doris Day was a beloved popular singer and the star of many films in the 1950s and 60s. She had her own television variety show and spent her decades-long retirement active in the Doris Day Animal Foundation. She performed with the likes of Cary Grant, Rock Hudson, and David Niven, which might lead one to think that she would choose a place of rest among the stars in some of the most famous California cemeteries. Instead, when she died this year at the age of 97, she left instructions to be buried with no funeral, no memorial, and no grave marker. To honor her wishes, her cremated remains were scattered in Carmel-by-the-Sea, California, her home for many years. Her estate was announced to be auctioned off in support of her foundation in April 2020. TARDAR SAUCE |
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