A quick search on Google about horror stories in the office yields results that are often related to the work environment, company culture, and, worse, their manager. The workforce has had much to say about how managers and leaders handle their teams.

They have every right to – after all, your employees are the backbone of your company. Without them, business owners, especially those who have only just entered their respective industries, can face insurmountable challenges in operations, service delivery, and customer relationships, among others.

As such, it is essential for startup and well-established companies to invest in management training that matters. Regardless of experience, managers are expected to refresh their skillset and knowledge base in order to adapt to the new demands of the workforce.

Management education and training provides you with the tools you need to not only hire the best people for your team but also take advantage of every new talent you add to your company. If you need more reasons as to why you should be getting management training, then this article is for you. It will show you what proper management can do in hopes of emphasizing that learning is an essential part of being an effective leader.

Over the past few years, the workforce has become increasingly diverse as technology has made it possible for people all over the world to connect with each other.

For managers, this trend can mean one of two things. For one, the increased diversity could pose unexpected challenges due to differences in culture, perspective, and work ethic.

However, with the proper management skills, company leaders can maximize this diversity to bring out your team's potential for innovation, which is an invaluable asset in an era of knowledge and technology.

You can motivate them to grab the opportunities instead of waiting for it to happen, become more assertive, and hone themselves into becoming future leaders. A good manager can also empower their team, which not only increases their productivity but also their reliability and sense of responsibility.

An incompetent manager can be detrimental to your team's productivity and creativity. Your employees may find themselves bogged down by inefficient processes, fatigue, and job dissatisfaction – factors that can increase your attrition and causing your company to lose the money you've invested for their hiring, training, and onboarding.

Management training helps you identify the signs and prevent the problem before it can happen. It can teach you what to do during coaching and one-on-one sessions as well as any other employee interaction you may have.

As a result, it can ensure that you're inspiring employee loyalty instead of inviting resignation letters to land on your desk.

Once you have a workforce that you can rely on, the next thing you may want as a manager is to ensure that you're doing things right on the business side of things.

Proper management training teaches you how to devise better business strategies that can benefit you in the short- and long-term. Such strategies may have something to do with your workforce, like what, when, and why you should implement an effective rewards system.

It may also teach you how to identify the market you want, reach the customers you need, and keep them coming back to your company for your products and services. The best training modules out there might also include how to handle finances, which is a key responsibility of leaders.

Imagine if you had a workforce that you have to replace every once in a while because people don't want to keep working for you. As a leader, this scenario means that you have to keep hiring people, investing in training over and over again. It also means that you have no one to rely on but yourself.

If you want to start focusing on growing your business, then consider getting management training for the simple fact that it ensures that you're hiring and training a team that will be with you throughout your growth as a company.

It also enables you to delegate tasks, which is something you'll find yourself grateful for when growing inevitably means more paperwork, tasks, and decisions. Having the knowledge and skills necessary to achieve this is essential for startups, especially if you want to hit the ground running.

As a general rule of thumb, remember this: happy workforce, happy leader. If your team spends their time trying to come up with efficient strategies and thinking up solutions to your problems, it's more than likely that you, as a manager, are leading an empowered team that can support the growth of your company. Invest in management training because your workforce is as much an asset as it is your capital.

The loss of talent is one of the biggest challenges organizations face. In a competitive job market, managers can help ensure stability by intentionally creating a culture that people will be more likely to stay in. And, contrary to what is often assumed, it does not have to cost a lot of money.

Here are 10 ways managers can create a culture people will want to join and thrive in: 

Denise Reid and Martha Webb-Jones provide consultation on Human Resources policies and processes through Raven Plume Consulting. The mission of Raven Plume is to change the way people think about funeral service by sharing knowledge and expertise with funeral home and crematory professionals, clients, and the public.

With Cremation Strategies & Consulting, part of Raven Plume Consulting, you can get a discount in developing your SOP Manual and reduce liability, improve employee training, and ensure operations are done correctly, efficiently, and consistently. Available free to CANA Members, the Crematory Management Program provides step-by-step instructions to build a Standard Operating Procedures Manual with the help of experts. Not a member? Learn more about why CANA keeps growing!

During the multiple heat-related illness cases relating to the United States Postal Service (USPS), the Occupational Safety and Health Administration (OSHA) was able to establish extreme heat being a major workplace hazard. However, the agency neglected to provide effective abatement techniques in the case.

Due to this, the Occupational Safety and Health Administration Review Commission (OSHRC) supported the decision made by the administrative law judge to vacate citations in all but one case.

These citations were related to seven employees working during the summer of 2016 in five cities. Every letter carrier experienced illness when they were out delivering mail in the extreme heat and had to get medical treatment. OSHA claimed that six of these workers became ill due to excessive heat. Five citations were filed against USPS for these alleged violations.

The Administrative Law Judge (ALJ) vacated the five citations after finding that OSHA neglected to prove the workplace conditions were hazardous and that effective and feasible measures were accessible to abate the conditions.

In four cases, the OSHRC agreed the agency established that the extreme heat conditions posed a hazard for the workers under the general duty clause but found the abatement suggestions OSHA made for the hazardous conditions for these cases fell short.

For the fifth one, the OSHRC found that USPS indeed neglected to offer proper heat-related illness training to the supervisors. Therefore, this case was remanded for additional review.

According to OSHA, the USPS was in violation of the general duty clause as it failed to implement a proper program to manage exposure to extreme heat. Thus, OSHA suggested the following measures:

• Rest and work cycles
• Employee monitoring and emergency response plans
• Monitoring USPS data on heat-related illnesses among employees
• Decreasing the outdoor time of employees
• Equipping delivery vehicles with air-conditioning
• Acclimatization
• Providing heat-related illnesses training

However, the USPS proved that it was already following most of these measures or was already in the process of implementing them.

This recent incident highlights the significance of a detailed heat illness prevention plan. Employers must not only have a written plan implemented but also provide sufficient training to their workers. Based on guidance provided by OSHA, supervisors must be trained to:

• Identify heat hazards and control them
• Spot early signs of heat illness or stress
• Provide appropriate first aid
• Quickly initiate emergency medical services

Aside from this, the guidance also recommends employers create a heat illness prevention plan that:

• Those employees returning from a break or new employees are acclimatized and gradually build up to work a full day in the heat
• Temperature and work exertion levels are monitored, classifying levels of physical exertion as heavy, moderate, and low
• Employees are provided easy access to water and have sufficient water to stay hydrated, along with proper breaks to rest
• Shades are installed to ensure employees can rest, or cooling systems or air conditioning is provided if feasible
• The buddy system should be implemented to encourage workers to monitor each other for heat-related illness symptoms
  

Training must be provided to workers to spot stages and signs of heat illness, steps to report them, provide appropriate first aid when needed, and understand how and when to get emergency medical assistance.

Over the Christmas holiday, I joined a few million other Americans by watching the second season of Netflix’s The Crown. We in the USA have an odd fascination with the British monarchy, reliably gobbling up anything related to the UK’s Royal Family.

The differences between our two governments can be simplified as form and function. The UK has a Prime Minister to govern (function) and a sovereign to serve as a living symbol of the country (form). The American Presidency rolls these two jobs into one.
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But Americans, ironically, divide the two components when it comes to business. Hiring is one of a company’s most impactful decisions for its brand, but is made by one of its most insulated and quantitative departments. Like every election, every hiring decision impacts the corporate brand. So, it’s high time marketing and HR got together. After all, Americans talk a lot about qualifications and experience, but we tend to vote for the candidate we’d rather have a beer with. Below are a few arguments for “the special relationship” between Marketing and HR, inspired by both sides of the Atlantic.

Your audience sees your employees as brand ambassadors, even if you don’t. Americans are less comfortable with pomp and spectacle than our British cousins. That’s why we can’t quite get our heads around the monarchy. We can understand hiring for experience, but hiring for image seems downright undemocratic.

But image—even spectacle—are sometimes exactly what a brand needs. From Branson to Bezos, some of the world’s most successful executives are masters of show business. At every level, your brand will be judged by the people you send into the room to represent it, both internally and externally. Even if you keep him away from clients, that hire with savant-like expertise but abysmal interpersonal skills will take his toll on your company’s culture and morale. On the other hand, the individual with an innate ability to inspire might just be able to learn the technical details.

It isn’t lonely at the top. Like the monarch, CEOs and celebrity spokespeople are the faces most carefully selected and cultivated for their ability to inspire. But commoners change history too. Executives and paid actors don’t have the only—or even the greatest—impact on a brand’s value. I can’t name the CEO of Home Depot, but I can tell you all about the terrible customer service I received last week.

Ritz Carlton understands this. Their “ladies and gentlemen serving ladies and gentlemen” mantra has helped the brand become synonymous with the very best in hospitality and dining. Compare that to the night shift at Holiday Inn: instilling form versus function at every level makes all the difference.

People failures are brand failures. The Crown’s sophomore season dove into the scandals that have plagued the royal family, providing another important lesson for marketers and HR pros: The best spokesperson arrangement in history can’t protect you from the spokesperson. Tiger Woods went from brand gold to brand anathema literally overnight. The Most Interesting Man in the World, one of the most successful campaigns in advertising history, was ultimately toppled simply because an actor wanted to retire.

It’s never wise to put all your eggs in one basket. If every hire is an investment in your company’s brand (and it is), then it’s wise to diversify that investment. A brand embodied by lots of faces means less disaster when one of them screws up or calls it quits.

Good form can enable good function. Repeatedly in The Crown, the precocious queen broke with tradition to influence world events, armed with nothing but her signature grace and eloquence. While her classically-trained advisors wanted to stick to traditional diplomatic channels, they were always left in admiration when she achieved what they were unable to.

Don’t underestimate the hard results of soft skills. Does that sales role really require industry expertise, or do you actually need a masterful relationship-builder? Which would you rather have at your front desk: the consummate hostess or an MBA?

When you’re desperate to hire someone who can do the job, remember that “the job” almost always includes representing your company—whether externally or internally. That goes beyond a résumé, a degree, or a certification. Too many front desks and front doors are manned by the most disengaged, disinterested person in the company. It can be helpful to think of those positions in terms of how much charisma they require, not how little technical ability.

You likely won’t have the luxury of hiring purely for ceremony, but putting Marketing in HR’s seat for a moment might yield some fruitful discussions—and might help you build a brand worthy of kings.

There’s been a revolt against hiring for cultural fit. Business Insider says it leads to a homogeneous workplace. The Harvard Business Review calls it a “misguided hiring strategy” and says to stop doing it. Forbes even published an obituary for the concept, saying it’s “fraught with bias.”

With all due respect, they’re wrong. Companies will always have a culture, and culture will always be set by the people you hire. If you’re not actively building a healthy one, you’re passively building a sick one. But the antidote for bad culture is to build good culture—not to pretend you’re building no culture at all. My worst hiring mistakes (and I’ve made doozies) have come when I’ve forgotten culture and hired for something else instead. Determining cultural compatibility is tough to do and tougher to do well—which is why only the best have mastered it.

A shibboleth might help.

The word “shibboleth” comes from an Old Testament story about the Ephraimites, who devised a test after they were infiltrated by an enemy tribe. Anyone who couldn’t say “shibboleth” with the local pronunciation exposed himself as an imposter. Today, the word is defined by Merriam-Webster as “a word or saying used by adherents of a party, sect, or belief and usually regarded by others as empty of real meaning.” A business who knows itself well will establish certain ideas and concepts that are central to its identity, but meaningless to the outside. Your best hires will be the people who recognize and share your excitement for those concepts.
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Here’s the really good news: establishing a shibboleth for your company will allow you to better focus your business, invigorate your team, and increase diversity. Here’s how:

The hard part—and the real importance—of a shibboleth isn’t finding someone who recognizes it, it’s picking one in the first place. To say exactly who fits your brand requires first understanding your brand. And most companies don’t. But that’s exactly why finding a concise articulation of your identity is such an important exercise: it requires the clarity that is essential for you to succeed.

Former IBM CMO Abby Kohnstamm put it this way: “The larger the company, the greater the importance there is to get to a clear, simple brand idea. Ours became a rallying point for the entire organization. It shapes the culture, it shapes business decisions, and it shapes behaviors.”

Think about that. A single litmus test against which a firm can evaluate everything. Every hire, every new product decision, every investment opportunity, aligned to a single idea. You know exactly what the most successful brands are about, because they’ve put in the sweat equity to figure it out for themselves. You can’t afford not to do the same.

It’s the second half of the definition of Shibboleth that’s really important: “usually regarded by others as empty of real meaning.” My firm, which specializes in advertising for stalled, stuck, and stale brands, has helped hundreds of companies find the essence of their identity. Usually, the identity we land on seems boring to outsiders—it hardly ever ends up in ad copy, and nobody outside the company ever knows about it. But that’s why it works: if you get it, you’re attracted to it. And if you don’t, you’ve already disqualified yourself.

The idea Kohnstamm (not to mention IBM’s 380,000 employees) was so excited about? “Solutions.” Not exactly a revolution. But solutions to business problems were what IBM’s customer wanted, and that’s what drives IBM. “Solutions” is a boring word to which IBM gave its own special insider meaning. So it became something that IBM employees could get excited about, because it provided a way of articulating what makes them special. And if solving problems isn’t your thing, you’re probably not what IBM is looking for.

Like a family in-joke, the whole point of a shibboleth is that the world doesn’t get it. It’s for you, so that when the going gets tough, your team can remind each other why they’re here.

The worst backlash against “culture fit” is from the people who assume it’s discriminatory. Patty McCord, former Chief Talent Officer from Netflix, argues that “culture fit” is shorthand for ‘people just like us.’ It’s a fair concern, and the practice can be abused that way. Weeding out anything feels a bit discriminatory, so it’s easy to assume that if we all have to agree on culture, then we’ll suffer from groupthink and bias.

But in fact, the opposite is true. Every hiring decision is inherently discriminatory. You’re picking one person out of thousands. If you have to discriminate, it’s better to discriminate on the right things. And mathematically, you’ll have the broadest talent pool if you discriminate on only one thing.
An organization that lacks a single point everyone can agree on isn’t diverse, it’s divided. On the other hand, the organization who can pinpoint the single concept that defines it has actually opened the door to the most diverse company (and thinking) possible, because it’s eliminated all other incidental or unintentional barriers. You can hire any age, race, background, or expertise, because none of those things are what define who you are.

In my own firm, we have a former realtor in our media department, an ex-political-consultant in accounts, and a psychology major in strategy. Our creative director will tell you that recent hires he’s made from outside the agency world have been a lot more successful than those he’s poached from other agencies. The reason those particular team members have panned out—even as seasoned agency pros have come and gone—is that we’re inspired and unified by a single idea. If we can all agree on that one thing, then we can bring diverse backgrounds, perspectives, and strengths to the table in its pursuit.
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To modern businesses, like the biblical Ephraimites, sifting out those who are not committed to your cause is a matter of life and death. It’s worth taking the extra time to make sure you’re doing it right. And when you do, you’ll stop wasting time on guesswork about whether a person, partner, or project is a fit—because you’ll know who you are.

How can you engage your employees' purpose to improve their performance and retain them? Eric Layer will share proven research and strategies from inside and outside the funeral business during his Keynote session — sponsored by National Guardian Life Insurance Co. (NGL) — at CANA’s Cremation Symposium this February 8-10 2023!
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Join Eric and others to share ideas on re-energizing passion and purpose in funeral service. This year, the event is focused on staffing efficiencies and retention with a host of experts to discuss. See what we have planned and register to attend: goCANA.org/ignite
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This post originally appeared in the McKee Wallwork Insights blog in April 2018, reprinted with permission.

#ActYourWage, Do Your Job, Working at Work, Morale Adjusted Productivity. These are all different expressions for the same concept – Quiet Quitting. If you haven’t heard the phrase taking over social media in the last few months, rest assured that your employees have. And that they are talking about it. But what is it? Is it a real thing? And how should you respond?

According to this NPR article, the phrase originated from a TikTok user’s seventeen-second video where he explains that quiet quitting happens when you’re “not outright quitting your job, but you’re quitting the idea of going above and beyond.” You still get your work done, but you’re rejecting the hustle culture mentality that your life has to be your work. He emphasizes that “your worth as a person is not defined by your labor.”

In other words, quiet quitting has nothing to do with quitting. It’s more a philosophy for doing the minimum work necessary to keep a job. Those who identify as quiet quitters reject the idea that life should revolve around work, and they resist the expectation of giving it their all or going beyond the job description. They believe in setting boundaries and completing the tasks assigned to them within the time they are paid to do them. No more working off-the-clock and checking messages every time the phone dings. They argue it is a way to safeguard their mental health, prevent burnout, and prioritize family and friends.

Critics say that it’s passive aggressive behavior, won’t accomplish what workers really want and puts more burden on their co-workers. Hamilton Nolan, writing in The Guardian, notes that workers in past generations felt this same sense of “collective malaise,” but rather than coasting at work they channeled their frustrations into creating unions. They didn’t quit and they weren’t quiet. They loudly fixed what they knew was wrong.
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According to Gallup’s 2022 Employee Engagement Survey, the proportion of workers engaged with their job remains at 32%, but the proportion of actively disengaged workers increased to 18%. These are the “loud quitters” who have most of their needs unmet and spread their displeasure and are also the most vocal in their own TikTok posts. The share of those in the middle, who are just not engaged at all, is 50%. They meet Gallup’s definition of people who do the bare minimum and are psychologically detached from their jobs. It is important to note that the increase in dissatisfaction is primarily among remote millennial and Gen Z workers. But these generations are becoming disengaged for the same reasons as anyone else, which we’ll cover shortly.

If Gallup’s data doesn’t show a significant change in how workers feel about their jobs over the last few years, then is quiet quitting even real? Many suggest that it’s just a new name for an old behavior and it is a normal feature of the American workplace. It’s actually less about an employee’s willingness to work harder and more creatively and more about the manager’s ability to communicate effectively and with empathy, build rapport, establish reasonable expectations, and provide the workflow efficiencies needed for everyone to do their jobs well.

We’re also likely talking about quiet quitting more than it’s actually happening. A recent Axios poll of younger workers found that only 15% were doing the minimum at work, despite a lot of them admitting that it sounded “appealing.”

Maybe those who coined the term and evangelize the idea of quiet quitting are realizing what those of us with more years in the workforce eventually learned – sometimes a job is just a job and doesn’t have a deeper meaning. And to get fired, you have to be bad at your job, not just coasting along. With employers constantly saying they can’t find enough workers, there is unprecedented job security for employees right now, reducing the incentive to work harder. Companies can’t afford to fire employees, and there are plenty of jobs open if someone does get fired.
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The reality is that whether we call it quiet quitting or burnout or something else, the behavior isn’t new. And low employee engagement is a symptom of poor management.

Managers need to learn to have conversations with their employees and get to know them as individuals – understand their life situations, strengths and goals. Then they need to have an honest conversation with each employee about the expectations of the job, using a job description as the guide.

No job description? Then that is the first thing that needs to be addressed. A job description is the most effective tool you have to clearly articulate  expectations to an employee. In addition to the knowledge and skills they’ll need to be successful, it should list the primary and secondary responsibilities of a person in this position, the number of hours they are expected to work each week and whether and how often that includes nights and weekends.

Second, managers need to create accountability for their entire team as well as all the individuals that make up that team. If you have an environment where some are held accountable and others get away without meeting expectations, disengagement will be common. Employees also need to see how their work contributes to the team’s goals and the organization’s larger purpose. Your culture should be one where every employee is engaged and feels they belong.

Finally, support the quiet quitters who define it as setting healthy boundaries and reclaiming their personal lives. Those employees who grind around the clock with limited time for self-care lose the ability to be their best selves, impacting the success of the organization. These are the workers who burn out and burnout can look a lot like quiet quitting. It appears as disengagement and often comes from expending too much effort for too little reward.

You support them by having a conversation and coming to agreement on whether the assigned work can be completed to the expected standards during the time they are being paid to work. If it can’t be, what resources are available to them to increase efficiency and prevent them from having to work overtime? Work-life balance is a key expectation now and it is not reasonable to rely on employees constantly going above and beyond the job description. If you want more, then explicitly convey that and expect to compensate the employee accordingly.

Your employees are your number one asset, and the funeral profession sees up to 30% of graduates leaving the profession after five years. Reasons cited for this include long hours, low pay and poor company culture. But these reasons are in a manager’s control. The answer to quiet quitting is out-loud conversations about your company’s culture, expectations, and goals. Employees will voluntarily go above and beyond when they feel valued, and that is how we retain and engage employees.

Who, in their right mind, would make the choice to be on call 24 hours a day, sometimes for days on end? Who would agree to leave their families at any hour of the day or night – or during holiday meals, or in the middle of a baseball or soccer game – to go and assist people that they’ve never met who are often in the middle of a crisis?

Ours is definitely not a career that would top most individuals’ lists of ideal jobs. We live the life described above every day and many of us never question why.

I believe this career chooses us. We are caregivers, essentially, and that is ingrained in a person. Being a caregiver is not something that can be taught. We are all in the funeral profession, but many of us can’t articulate a “why.” There is no why. It’s simply because it’s where we know we are supposed to be. It’s in our minds, and, more importantly, it’s in our hearts. I use the word lifepath for this phenomenon. Some may use the word calling. I agree with both descriptives, and both reflect that this is not typically a career that is chosen.

Too often, the public perception of a funeral professional is as someone who “gets used to death” or isn’t bothered by it. Little do they know how far from the truth that is. I often reply to those mistaken perceptions by saying that “the moment that this doesn’t bother me is the moment that I need to turn around and walk out that door because I would not be able to serve you as I should.” If death doesn’t affect me any longer, then I am no longer a benefit to the families I aim to serve. My emotion is what allows me the compassion to serve people as I do. Do I have to hide my emotions on a regular basis? Yes. But that doesn’t mean I’m not affected.

This industry is not for the faint of heart. You need the compassion to deal with grieving families, but you also need to have self-confidence and leadership skills to be able to handle the menagerie of scenarios that are thrown your way. Over the years that I have been involved in the business, as we all know, family dynamics have changed drastically! These dynamics play a role in how we approach families, and it can be a game of tiptoe through the minefield. The arrangement conference can be a place where issues that have accrued over many years come to a head, all in front of a funeral director who doesn’t necessarily need or want to know all the family secrets. However, we are forced to play referee in the boxing ring.

On top of all that, we then address the financial side of a funeral. Money is never an easy topic to discuss. It’s even harder when a family does not have the financial means to have the funeral they want for their loved one, and we are the ones that have to tell them that.

Following the arrangement conference, a funeral director has to confirm clergy/celebrant; contact the cemetery; write obituaries, have them approved by family, submit them to the newspapers and proofread for accuracy; file the death certificate and burial permit; go to the health department to pick up the certified death certificates; order merchandise; print memorial items (i.e., register book, memorial cards, thank you cards); remove, dress, casket, and cosmetize the deceased; set up the chapel; schedule staff for viewings and/or services; clean the facility; clean the vehicles; order flowers and arrange for catering; and “other duties as assigned.” All in about 3 days! And, just for one family served! Our minds are going in all different directions trying to make sure that each family feels like they are the only family we are serving.
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So many times, I have families say, “I didn’t know you did all this” or “I didn’t know you did that.” Yes, we do. We are here to make this as easy as we can for you.

It’s essential to remember that caregivers need someone to care for and listen to them. Not only do we navigate the emotion and reality that death brings to the families that we serve, but we also deal with the day-to-day struggles of the workplace, life outside the office, family, our own personal struggles and emotions. Work-life balance takes on new meaning as we try to not let the personal interfere with the lifepath that has chosen us in the death care industry.

If someone knows that they aren’t the only one dealing with a situation, could a sense of solidarity give them the strength and vision to continue to follow their calling? It's not just you. Many of us have been there. I have been there. Knowing that our industry runs high for mental health injuries, it’s important to bring options to those who are questioning if they should stay or go. When employers focus on the mental health of their employees, it leads to increased productivity, improved job satisfaction, higher retention rates and less burnout.
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We need to place our own mental health at the forefront so that we can serve the families that request our services to the best of our ability and give them the best that each one deserves.

The only people that can truly understand what we funeral professionals do and deal with on a daily basis, are others in the industry. This is why Funeral Professionals Peer Support is such a wonderful and welcome addition to our world. It’s for peers, by peers. We are there to educate, to guide, to provide feedback and sometimes just to listen. It’s a safe place for funeral professionals to come if they need someone who understands.

The benefits of peer support have been recognized for years. Some of the benefits that have been found in many settings, such as workplace, addiction counseling and educational have been:

I am looking forward to meeting some new people at the CANA Convention and I am very excited to continue to spread the word about the benefits of Funeral Professionals Peer Support!!

Early on in my career a mentor of mine said these words to me when I was dealing with some challenges associated with a family we were serving: “It takes all kinds to make the world go round.” I was still fairly new to the funeral service scene and hadn’t experienced the joys of dealing with families that didn't agree or get along very well. This phrase stuck with me all these years and seems perfectly fitted to where our great big crazy funeral service world is these days—or maybe just the world in general. Yet, in many ways I also feel like we have somehow missed the mark in funeral service insofar as actually “seeing” how diverse our profession really is, both internally and related to the families we serve.

You’d be hard pressed to find a funeral director who will tell you that they’ve seen it all. Most agree that no matter how long your career in funeral service may be, you will simply not see everything. I have to say that over these last couple of years, we as funeral service professionals have seen and experienced things that we never thought we would. If recent times have taught us anything, it’s that changing our ways may not have the downside we anticipated.

One of the changes that has been most profound for me has been witnessing firsthand how much more diverse our profession and our clientele are—more so than I had ever realized before. As we enter Pride Month 2022, I’m humbled to say that I have made a small contribution to the long-overdue conversation about bringing more visibility to the LGBTQ+ Community. We need to do this within the funeral service profession while also helping our colleagues learn how to serve our community better. My experience has confirmed that we, as funeral and cremation service providers, must become better attuned to the diversity both in each other and in our clients—which is often staring us right in the face.

Diversity, Equity and Inclusion have generated quite the buzz across many industries of late. And while this recognition is long overdue, it’s clearly here to stay. How will this change the way we provide funeral and cremation services to our families and embrace all employees?

Here are a few thoughts:

If I had a nickel for every time my mother said these very words to me as I grew into a—well let’s say “challenging” adolescent—I would be a wealthy man! But, when you stop and think about it, how we speak to our families and to our fellow employees can be way more impactful than we imagine.

Many years ago, I encountered a situation where a family did not want to mention the partner of one of the deceased’s children in the obituary. That son, by the way, was sitting at the same table as his siblings to make funeral arrangements for their mom. The family felt that it would be awkward to mention his partner since the couple wasn’t married—despite the fact that gay marriage wasn’t even an option at the time. Although it took some effort to contain myself, I assured his siblings that we could and should list anyone who is important to the deceased or her family.

This intervention brought some resolution to the situation while also validating the relationship between the son and his partner. I’ll never forget it.

We should choose our words carefully and, even more importantly, be cognizant of the way we deliver those words. What we say and how we say it to a family could change the trajectory of their entire experience with us, for better or for worse. I hope that son, and his whole family, took my words to heart that day and valued every member of their family.

Today’s families want and need to know what their options are. They want time to make decisions, and they certainly don’t want to feel that they are being spoken down to. We never want them to question if there were other options available after the fact and so must offer them everything from the beginning. So, take a little extra time to think about what you say before you say it, and carve out a little time after serving a family to reflect on what went well, or not so well, and find ways to improve for next time.

When it comes to the workplace, the same concept easily applies. We must have the same sensitivity to the words we say and how we say them when interacting with fellow employees. Fostering an inclusive work environment where diversity is celebrated and not ignored means educating ourselves on inclusive language to accommodate the backgrounds and cultures of our teammates. It does no good for morale for even one single employee to feel discriminated against or  marginalized as less than their colleagues because of their differences. In a profession where compassion and empathy are key to success, it shouldn’t be too challenging to nurture a work environment where all feel included and embraced.

Of all the musicals I had an opportunity to perform in during my high school days, Fiddler on the Roof was by far my favorite. (A video is available to those interested, but I digress.) The crux of the show is the concept of tradition and the struggles that often go along with watching the traditions we have known our whole lives begin to change. In our profession, we often use the term “Traditional Funeral;” however I’ve tried to get away from that because, with over 15 years in this business, it’s been my first-hand experience that just one tradition simply doesn’t exist (and perhaps never really did).

There are numerous customs and traditions associated with everything from the mode of final disposition to how the deceased is memorialized. Throwing the word “tradition” around too much may alienate families that feel self-conscious for not conforming to what funeral professionals  view as traditional. Especially as cremation continues to become more prevalent than ever before, let’s reassure our families that “tradition” is whatever they want to make it and make sure we honor those traditions, whether they match our ideas or not.

I’ll never forget when I offered to have a couple of classic cars parked outside the funeral home during visitation for a family I was working with. This was not a groundbreaking idea by any means, but for them it instantly made them feel seen. They felt that their husband and father, who LOVED working on classic cars, was more than just another person we were caring for and that his life mattered. Perhaps having some hot rods at the funeral home wasn’t what they envisioned as “traditional,” but it certainly was the best fit for them.

If the pandemic has taught us anything it’s that a good shake up in the funeral service industry may have been long overdue. We turned on a dime to respond to the need for offering our families more technology than ever—and were able to provide never-seen-before products and services. We have begun to better recognize that the demographics of funeral service professionals are changing rapidly and that more and more so-called “first generation” funeral professionals are taking on ownership roles within the profession. We simply have to realize that times, they are a-changin’ and we better get on board before it’s too late.

We may not know exactly where we’ll land, but we need to be creative and open to offering today’s families what they’re looking for. We don’t need to make everything up as we go along, but sometimes the best ideas on how to give pause to a loss and pay proper tribute to a life lived come from the places we least expect. My hope is that we end up in a funeral service world where we don’t grasp too firmly to the concept of “This is how we’ve always done it” but rather “Let’s try it.”

Diversity in our workplaces and in the wants and needs of the families we serve each day is quickly earning a front row seat in our profession. A thoughtful and sensitive response is essential to our success. So, do a little homework on diversity, equity, and inclusion and see how you can incorporate it into your world. And by the way, happy Pride.

What is the true definition of culture and why is it important in business and our profession?
The dictionary defines culture as a collection of behaviors and beliefs associated with a particular group. It is also the quality of a person or group of people that comes from appreciating excellence.

As an owner since 1989, after reading Dr. Gustavo’s book, I began to realize that our company culture was not effective and that it was upside down. I had been raised and always thought that our customers were our most important asset and that we should do everything to make them our #1 priority.  I had a business coach and consultant come in and conduct a 360 on me and others in management. What we learned was that our staff was afraid of failing and afraid of failing me as the owner if they made a mistake in service to our customers. Wow, what an eye-opener that was! Our culture was one of getting everything right for the customer each time and doing our best to not have our staff fail. Thus, each day, team Baue functioned with a fear of failing.

This culture was not working. No staff can be motivated by fear of failure. They needed to be supported, trained to know it was ok to fail. We as owners and managers had to change our behaviors and share our failures with them too. We learned they needed more praise, encouragement, and enhanced training. They also needed to feel supported, understood, and know that they mattered to us as our first priority in every decision we made.

Today, during the worldwide pandemic, many staff and funeral service professionals around the country and the world continue to feel isolated, fearful, and alone. Some have experienced their own losses and are exhausted. We are seeing and reading about employees who are leaving our profession and companies in larger numbers more than ever before.  Our profession is part of the “Great Resignation” and at the same time, deaths are increasing, not just from the pandemic, but from an aging population.

The question we should be asking ourselves, is what are we going to do about this? We struggle to find new hires, new licensees, and those that continue on our team are tired and could be considering leaving in the future. The next generation of Millennials and Gen Z (those born after 1993) are not entering our profession, nor enrolling in mortuary schools in large enough numbers to fill the losses we are experiencing. Something must give, and somebody must do something. That somebody, I believe is us! That somebody is looking back at us in the mirror every morning.

Wake up funeral service! Admit we have made mistakes and go fix them!!!

As a profession, we must acknowledge that we are not managing our cultures correctly, nor do we have our licensing laws aligned with the desires and skills for future employee retention. The licensing law topic is a blog for another day. Suffice it to say that most of the licensing we require, along with the training we provide, is not aligning with what a future hire wants to attend, nor what our client family’s needs are. Is it occurring to any of us that we are misaligned in our efforts and the culture we have created? Does it concern us that our clients are arranging direct burials and direct cremations in increasing numbers, and not choosing us to help with the service or they are choosing no service at all?

I believe that we can and must do things differently going forward. My “wake up call” was in 2014. I chose to behave differently as a leader. I chose to do something about our culture to better care for our team members and show them how much they were appreciated. I chose to listen to their development and work environment needs. We changed our focus from our customers to our staff and began on a path to help them become the best leaders, caregivers, and the best event planners they could be. I do not think it was by accident that our company volume grew, nor that we became the “employer of choice” in our region for years to come. It convinced me back then as it does today, that a strong positive culture of caring more for our team members than we do for our customers was and is the right thing to do.

In June of 1912, our 26th President of the United States, Teddy Roosevelt, stated “Nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care.” This quote was shared while he was speaking in Chicago, IL.

For more ideas from Chicago, I interviewed Barbara Kemmis, Executive Director of the Cremation Association of North America (CANA), headquartered in the greater Chicago area for my Elevating Women in Funeral Service Series on the Your Funeral Coach Talks podcast. Barbara shared her thoughts on mentorship, leadership and the growth CANA has experienced in membership, finances, and programs. She also consulted her crystal ball to discuss the future growth of cremation and trends in our profession. I hope you will listen in. 

Be well, spend some time this week showing others in your organization how much you care, want to hear their ideas, concerns, and fears.
And most of all, I hope you discover your “wake up call” as you look in the mirror tomorrow morning and think about what you want for your company’s future culture. Better yet, ask your team what they think!

Story is also a valuable way to process the effects of change. During my ten years with CANA, I have experienced the remarkable pace of change in attitudes toward cremation. In the broader profession, cremation was considered a threat to profitability. I heard extreme statements such as, “We burn our trash, not people.” I heard denials such as, “My funeral home doesn’t do direct cremation. That’s for the guy down the street.” It seemed that no one really liked cremation, but it was a necessity.

CANA’s cremation story has been remarkably consistent: Cremation is preparation for memorialization. Cremation can be profitable to a business and accessible to consumers. Every grieving family deserves a funeral director’s attention and expertise.

Today, a new issue too many CANA Members share is a dwindling pipeline of qualified and quality funeral professionals coming in to do this essential work. Whether they are retiring for a new experience or burning out of a challenging job made harder by a pandemic, the workforce feels like it’s shrinking.
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Fortunately, story can be useful here, too. When I read books about places I have never been, I can imagine myself in the story. Can we create stories about these problems to arrive at solutions and envision different outcomes? Below you’ll find some stories I have heard recently from CANA members during my travels. I challenge you to consider how you would react in each situation, and what solutions you can provide.

Kerry has been working at Baggum & Taggem Funeral Home for 9 years, starting just out of mortuary school as an apprentice. She likes her coworkers, gets along with her boss, and has earned the experience that comes with being a licensed funeral director in the same company and the same town for almost a decade. Martin was just hired on as a new funeral director, filling an opening when Jared left.

Martin graduated the same year as Kerry, but this is his third funeral home because he’s changed employers every few years. He’s catching on, and Kerry doesn’t mind training him, but he brings so many different perspectives to the work they do. She’s beginning to wonder if she’s missed something by staying in one place. But, then again, even if she has, how can she be sure that she’d like a new place as much as she likes where she is now?
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If you were Kerry, would you stay put or start applying?
If you were Kerry’s boss, what would you do – try to keep a loyal employee or support her finding new opportunities? How?

Emily is 35 and left a boring office job to follow her passion and become a funeral director. Ever since her father died when she was 14, Emily has been fascinated with funeral directing, but first she followed the career path her father wanted her to follow. She went to college and  found a steady job with benefits in a well-known corporation.

Now, she has student loan debt from two degrees and is happier than she could imagine as a new licensee. Her apprenticeship was hard work, but she had a great mentor and earned great experience in the prep room and the arrangement room while learning the inner workings of her funeral home.

Emily considers herself to be a hard worker and is willing to put in the hours necessary, but also wants to maintain her hobbies and friendships. That was hard during her apprenticeship, but she is wondering if it will even be possible as a full-time funeral director.
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What does Emily do next? Would you hire her?
How should she navigate her new career? If you were her mentor, how would you advise the next 5-10 years of her career?

Robert sipped his first cup of coffee of the day and scrolled through his LinkedIn feed. No death calls had come in during the night so he slept a solid six hours and was feeling great. A few moments later, he saw a notification from his mortuary school buddy, John:

“John is starting a new position as Retired”

Shaking his head at the peculiar LinkedIn grammar, he contemplated what this meant. Robert hadn’t seen John since last year’s convention when everything seemed fine. They had talked about their kids and grandkids, HR headaches, whether or not to put in a crematory despite all the zoning hassles. Normal stuff. John hadn’t said anything about retiring. Did he sell the business? Is he healthy? What will he do now?

Robert sent John a text: “Congrats, I think?” and continued getting ready for the day. Soon, he heard his phone ping in response:
“Congratulations, definitely. Call me.”
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What’s next for John? It’s natural to celebrate a friend’s new job or business milestone while comparing yourself to them. Should John retire and/or sell?
Will Robert’s story have a happy ending?

Lori has the potential to be a fantastic funeral home manager. She has a natural charisma to build trust with consumers and coworkers, and she also keeps her eye on the details of the business. However, Lori also has a silver post in her left eyebrow and a blue streak in her dark hair. Mark doesn’t have any of those things – the charisma, eye for detail, or the piercing and dye job. He does have over 15 years of experience and knows the business inside and out.
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For the third time this month, Lori is staring at an empty shelf. It’s where the Bernard keepsake was supposed to be, but it’s not there. Mrs. Bernard is coming in today – she’d confirmed with her on the phone just yesterday. Before she even knows why it’s empty, she’s already blaming Mark and gearing up to talk to their manager about his inability to follow the process. The paperwork doesn’t show that the family picked the necklace up, but Mark didn’t note it down the last few times either.
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Lori is glaring at him through the arrangement room’s glass door. It must be the third time this month, and Mark cannot imagine why she’s giving him a hard time when he’s with a grieving family. He greeted Mrs. Bernard when she came to pick up the keepsake necklace and confirmed that all was well when Lori was on lunch earlier. Now, after farewelling Mrs. Bernard, he’s delayed his own break to assist this family who arrived more than an hour ago. He cannot deal with Lori’s attitude and this overdose arrangement on an empty stomach for much longer.
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How many assumptions can you identify in this story? How would you manage the conflicts?
What if you were Lori? What if you were Mark?

If you have read this far, you know there are infinite possibilities for the Kerry, Martin, Emily, Robert, John, Lori, and Mark in each of these stories. Your reaction to each of them may be a rich source of self-reflection and growth.

The funeral profession values stories. Obituaries and eulogies are stories, whether delivered in person or on social media. Funerals, memorial services and celebrations of life are places to gather and share memories and, yes, stories.

Your business has a story. Perhaps it started out with your great-grandfather building cabinets and coffins and has grown and evolved to his great-granddaughter running twelve locations and an online cremation business. Perhaps it began with you entering mortuary school, working hard in various funeral homes and now contemplating buying your own.
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Perhaps I haven’t heard your story yet, so I can’t relay it here. But your story matters. Your story helps you organize facts and make sense of life and death. Your story is changing and reacting to new challenges and opportunities. Sharing your story helps you make sense of it, and helps others grow from your experience. Seeing yourself in someone else’s story not only improves your emotional intelligence, but it means you’re that much better prepared to meet a similar challenge in the future.

There are so many compelling reasons to master the art of story and use it as the basis of all your communication. It can help you and your company attract and retain talent. It can help you and your staff to cope with change.
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Remember, your story matters to all of the many audiences who may hear it. Be sure to construct it carefully, test it and refine it, and shout it from the rooftops once it’s ready.