It feels awkward to begin emerging from pandemic isolation and start attending in-person meetings and events. After 15 months of virtual meetings and phone calls, it’s a good time to review networking tips for interacting with people in the flesh. While the core best practices for networking remain the same, our collective COVID-19 caution alters some actions we rarely thought about before. I am fully vaccinated and eager to be around other people. But I’ll admit I’m a little rusty. At a recent board meeting, outdoors, I offered elbow bumps instead of handshakes, which felt weird at first. Then I realized that others appreciated it. However, as one who’s been a natural networker since kindergarten, I’m finding that it takes forethought and self-control to avoid automatically lapsing into life-long patterns that today don’t feel safe enough for me. For example, although I’ve decided I’m not ready for a bare-hand-to-bare-hand handshake yet, I was caught off guard and my muscle memory took over at a recent event when a respected elder extended his right hand to me. I automatically shook hands and then was obsessed with not touching anything until I could wash my hands. I was anxious even though I’m 99 percent sure this gentleman is fully vaccinated. My mind kept nagging me, “Had he also exchanged handshakes with others who aren’t vaccinated?” ![]() I know I am not alone. Rockabilly singer and guitarist Deke Dickerson recently released a song called “The Year that Got Away.” The song’s line, “I’ll never take a hug for granted again but it’s still so strange to shake your hand,” resonates with me as in-person meetings and events start returning to my calendar. While the COVID-19 pandemic is far from over, many states and cities are easing restrictions and returning to almost the way things were before 2020. Beyond trying to figure out whether a handshake or hug is appropriate and safe, we may need to refresh our networking skills. This means reviewing networking basics as well as considering new COVID-era sensitivities and sensibilities. I offer the following networking tips. NETWORKING TIPS IN COVID’S SHADOWSET GOALS. Determine why you plan to attend a business event. Are you there primarily to learn from a speaker or do you want to meet others? In either case, decide ahead of time how many new people you plan to meet and why. Research the hosting organization, expected attendees and the location. Understand the venue and evaluate any COVID-19 measures in place and how those stack up against your readiness to venture out. LOOK GOOD. Dress appropriately for the occasion. Remember that you represent not only yourself, but the organization you represent. It may seem harder to gauge what to wear now, after more than a year of work-from-home casual attire. Compare notes on how to dress post-pandemic with trusted colleagues who are known for exhibiting professionalism. Smart networking attire always includes a sufficient supply of business cards in an easily accessible pocket. BE FRIENDLY. After avoiding contact with others for more than a year, you may be out of practice in initiating conversations with strangers. As much as ever, it’s important to project confidence and a willingness to talk with others. Smile, make eye contact and strike up conversations. In-person eye contact will feel different than all those Zoom meeting screen stares. Greet others with open-ended, friendly questions that can lead to conversation. Plan some conversation-starter questions ahead of time. LISTEN. Be genuinely interested in what the other person is saying and interact appropriately. For those of us who have craved being around other people, the tendency may be to talk too much. Listen more and talk less. Maintain proper body space distancing, which today may be farther away from others than it was pre-COVID. Successful networkers often report that when they ask questions, listen and show interest in others, they are remembered as being interesting themselves. RECAP YOUR CONVERSATION. If you’ve met someone whom you’d like to contact again, make your parting words a specific reminder of the issue or point you have in common, followed by a promise of your next steps. Exchange contact information. HANDSHAKE OR ALTERNATIVE? Decide ahead of time whether you feel comfortable shaking hands with others. If you’re not, have your handshake alternative ready. With a family member, practice initiating an elbow bump, fist bump, nod, or small bow so it will come naturally. Be prepared to react gracefully to puzzled reactions. Conversely, if you would like to shake hands with others, anticipate some people declining, and be ready to react gracefully to that situation, too. WASH YOUR HANDS. Before, during and after the pandemic, this is always a sound practice. I’ve always been a bit of a germaphobe, so for decades my habit has been to wash my hands or use hand sanitizer regularly during networking adventures: After the Uber, taxi or public transit ride and before the event. Between the networking reception and the subsequent breakfast, lunch or dinner. Upon returning to the office. I recommend this practice. It aligns with COVID-19 safety measures, and it can help prevent spreading colds. It also protects others. FOLLOW UP. Keep promises you made to others while networking. Send the document or link you promised, make the email introduction you offered to make, set a date for that meeting or for the proverbial “lunch sometime.” ENJOY. Networking can be fun, as well as beneficial to your work. Perhaps these networking tips will help you. This post originally appeared in the KSC Blog on June 18, 2021. We thank Kathy Schaeffer for allowing us to reprint it here for you. You can more of her insights on communication and leadership on their blog: https://www.ksapr.com/blog/ Figuring out when you’re ready to reconnect is the most important part of networking. CANA is excited to host one of the first in-person national conventions in Seattle next week: CANA’s 103rd Cremation Innovation Convention. We’re excited to reconnect safely, but we know it’s not for everyone. See what we have planned and if you’re ready to join your colleagues in the Emerald City August 11-13: goCANA.org/CANA21.
We are all virtual now. In addition to conducting virtual funerals and celebrations of life, you may find yourself attending birthday parties or toasting at Happy Hours online. The global pandemic and local gathering rules have forced us all to plan events within new limitations and with a whole new set of considerations. CANA followed suit by converting our 102nd Annual Cremation Innovation Convention to a virtual event. It turned out well, but it involved a lot of careful planning. Once our leaders and staff decided to go virtual, we found we had a short four months to make a lot of decisions. CANA’s may have been the profession’s first virtual convention, but it won’t be the last. Below I’ve shared some thoughts about our process and the lessons we learned. I hope it helps you as you plan your own events—whether it’s taking your next graveside service online or gathering family and friends for a virtual game night. Start with WHYAs a longtime devoted fan of Simon Sinek, I looked to his recommendations for guidance on moving forward with a virtual meeting. In both his viral TED Talk and subsequent book, Start with Why, Sinek encourages us to look at what we do (hold an Annual Convention) and examine the heart of it (why do we hold it?). CANA started our planning process by posing the difficult question “Why should we have a virtual convention?” Other associations within the profession and around the world had cancelled their events, so why should CANA move forward? The immediate answer to the why question was, essentially, why not? We had four months to plan and a compelling desire to re-envision our 102nd annual event to a virtual platform, so we met the challenge. We are an association known for a progressive response to disruptions, so our leadership and staff were eager to uphold that reputation. Closely related to WHY is HOW – how will we be able to successfully translate the CANA convention experience to a virtual platform? An in-person CANA convention takes place in one large room. Everyone is in that room together, meaning attendees and exhibitors are learning, eating, drinking and networking seamlessly throughout the event. A virtual platform supports the same integration, also bringing everyone together into one space—an easy adaptation. We had already established a strong virtual link to the cremation and death care professionals. From the beginning of the pandemic, CANA has convened its members to share information, hear from experts and formulate solutions together. Networking and education have never been more closely linked. So for us, a final WHY to hold the virtual convention was our charge to advance CANA’s mission and serve members and the broader profession. Having identified WHY a virtual convention has value, we identified three key elements to its success:
This list is absolutely in priority order. By August 2020, many of us were craving connection, even if it was only available via a screen. Networking was the top priority, as it is with in-person conventions, so we sought a platform that supported networking in multiple ways. While the CANA Convention prioritized networking over other elements, every event is different. It is incumbent on the host to identify and market the event’s value proposition – jargon for the WHY. Your event may prioritize education, community engagement or gathering together. Once you know that, you can then market the event and attract key audiences. However, just as with in-person events, you’d better be able to deliver what you promise. Below are some of the questions we posed that informed our planning, our decision-making—and even our marketing—with our answers. Why is preparing for a virtual event so different?One important lesson we learned is that very few attendees planned to completely pull themselves away from the office or work during the convention time. Of course, because the rituals of packing and flying or driving to the convention and the respite of a hotel stay were not a factor, I am not sure it would have occurred to me to stay away from work either. I came home from the CANA office and slept in my bed at the end of each day. The etiquette of an in-person event is familiar. Advance preparation is helpful, but an attendee or exhibitor can grab a program at the registration desk and make snap decisions about how to plan their experience without much of a learning curve. We know what to do, and we can take cues from the other people in the event. A virtual event has a steeper learning curve. There are layers of technology to navigate just to conduct a group chat, or simply to identify who is currently available on the platform. For our Convention, the platform required a computer (not a tablet or phone) in order to get the optimal networking experience. So even if attendees and exhibitors were able to run their business on the go, they couldn’t get the full convention experience from a phone or tablet. Since CANA members do not spend large portions of their day in front of computers, many struggled with internet access or finding a compatible browser. Many discovered that they didn’t have an accessible camera on their computer. We could not have predicted these challenges, but we created and offered a lot of advance education and technical support to help attendees and exhibitors understand and use the specific platform tools. We did this on YouTube with walkthroughs, emails with images and instructions, and on this very blog. And it was effective! Most of the attendees planned ahead and knew how to use the platform and therefore learned quickly. Unfortunately, many of the exhibitor staff who set up the booths and attended the CANA training were not the same people who staffed the actual booth during the Convention. 90% of technical support questions came from exhibitors on Day One of the event. ​Why is networking during a virtual event so different?Many registrants apologized in the post-event evaluation survey, explaining that they successfully attended the education sessions, but were pulled away afterward to serve families and help staff and thus were unable to follow up and network with their colleagues. That split attention had another consequence—no break from their regular duties. This is especially unfortunate at a time when our profession is working so hard, possibly harder than ever before. A Convention provides that intangible benefit—getting away to spend time with CANA friends and getting the opportunity to play as hard as you work. That may seem inappropriate during a global pandemic, but it is important for our physical and mental well-being. In a virtual meeting, networking is a bit more difficult than simply walking up to an individual or a group and joining in the conversation. “Seeing” people on a virtual platform doesn’t have the immediacy of seeing their faces, but rather checking a participant list or patiently waiting for a response to a text. Just as you text first to arrange a Facetime conversation, the video chat on the platform worked much the same way. Additionally, there was quite a bit of uncertainty as to the etiquette of a virtual convention. How should we behave? What comes across as pushy? I am confident we will get better at this with time. This uncertainty often meant that attending the convention was, at least initially, a pretty isolated and individual experience. It took effort to find people and text chat or video chat. There was no walking into a giant room abuzz with voices and full of people. Most in-person attendees are owners or managers and often come solo or bring one employee. It is expensive to attend and in-person event, and someone has to keep the business running. Conversely for the virtual event, some members registered several people from their staff so they could have a watch party at the office, enjoy the presentations and move through the exhibit hall together to give some conversation and camaraderie to the event. Others formed their groups online and kept the conversation alive in the chat functions and caught the competitive spirit with our passport game. The hook of cheap CE became a team-building opportunity. Why is a virtual trade show so different?CANA Supplier Members are a crucial factor as to WHY we hold our Convention. This event was our one big annual opportunity to connect exhibitors with attendees and showcase their products, services and solutions. A virtual convention supports our funeral home, cemetery, and crematory members sharing their challenges with professional colleagues, and our supplier members putting their solutions front-and-center. In addition to apologizing for missing networking, many registrants apologized to exhibitors in the post-event evaluation survey for not visiting the trade show or for only visiting after hours. Some attendees chose to simply enjoy watching the pre-loaded video and downloading information from the booth page rather than interact more directly with exhibit staff. Even those who attended during staffed hours would not necessarily communicate through the booth text or video chat. The average booth attracted 150 visitors with maybe 5% entering the group video chat. That is completely opposite of an in-person trade show experience and entirely out of the exhibitors’ control. The primary challenge faced by exhibitors was they couldn’t “see” visitors to their booth. Many had set up a table-top style booths with a video feed, expecting people to click on the group video chat link and enter their booth, but only a handful of attendees did so. The surveys showed that they either didn’t notice the link or weren’t sure what they would walk into. One survey respondent specifically requested a preview to see if they wanted to enter and who was in there, before committing to clicking on the link. If seeing is believing, no wonder exhibitors questioned whether the final tally of booth visitors CANA downloaded through the platform and forwarded to each of them was accurate. Here too, the etiquette of a virtual exhibit booth was uncertain. Was it rude to click on a link unannounced and barge in? Why were some booths empty and while others were staffed? Why is virtual education so different?Education is what CANA does well and is the easiest to translate to a virtual experience. CANA’s online Crematory Operations Certification Program (COCP) is wildly successful. CANA webinars are attracting crowds as well. But a convention is different. It is an event that people experience together, in one room, at an appointed time for several hours in what would otherwise be a busy workday. At least, that is what meeting planners believe and plan for accordingly, but many of our virtual meeting attendees and exhibitors were multi-tasking and not giving their full attention to the online content. Fortunately, across the board, our presenters received rave reviews. We were very thoughtful and intentional about our selection of presenters – a virtual event is no time for a sage on a stage. A presenter needs to engage with the audience through polls, questions asked and answered in the chat, and the electric energy to keep an invisible audience focused on the content and away from their inboxes. Handouts and downloadable slidedecks are valuable, but the presentation itself needs to be the first priority. What can we do to make it better?We are excited to call CANA’s Convention a success:
CANA enjoyed the benefits of going first, in that attendees and exhibitors were curious about a virtual platform, forgiving of technical difficulties and offered grace to those learning the new technology. We learned that not every element of an in-person convention translates to a virtual platform. For example, I decided to hold the membership meeting the week after the Convention, which meant we didn’t have a quorum and had to reschedule again and work harder to achieve the quorum we easily obtained during the convention. I won’t repeat that mistake. It was heartening to see how every event participant learned to be the expert, then went on to help others. That could mean that they discovered something, then posted it to share with others. CANA is made up of caring people who want to support and help each other. We were all learning the platform even as we were teaching others. For the event, CANA Staff opened the Convention early to allow for some time to familiarize with the platform. That, in addition to live tech support by phone, email, one-on-one chat, Zoom, and Convention chat meant that we were able to answer questions and get people on their virtual feet quickly. And with CANA staff on the other end of the line, we were a friendly and familiar connection to our registrants. Bottom line, the old adage “You get out of it what you put into it” is as true with a virtual event as in life. Whether through attention, technology, or preparation, we all can improve. What comes next?More virtual events – for certain. A number of state, provincial and national associations are offering their own virtual conventions and trade shows in Fall 2020. Will they be the same as in-person experiences? No. They will be great, but they won’t be the same. Virtual is an alternative, but not a replacement. CANA is planning a Hybrid Symposium on February 10-11, 2021 in Las Vegas at The Linq Hotel and Casino. That means we’ll provide the opportunity to gather in-person for live sessions and Vegas fun, with portions of the program livestreamed for online participants. I am optimistically planning for a hybrid experience, because there has to be a path forward and CANA is excited to find it. CANA is also planning another Game Night for members. You are working hard and deserve a break and prizes. In the meantime, we’ll continuing learning together and helping one another. So until we can safely meet again, I will see you via Zoom. Did you miss our Virtual Convention and Trade Show? You can browse the exhibits on our event website, and we'll make the presentations available soon. Check out our full listing of Online Education and come back soon for the event recordings! With the many layers of travel restrictions in place now to support public safety efforts, CANA is taking you where no cremation professional has ever gone before – to a completely virtual convention! But what does that mean? And what can you expect from this virtual experience? Fortunately, we’ve been able to re-create many of your favorite parts of the Convention in this new meeting space. Here's a downloadable and printable Quick Reference Guide. If you're already registered, keep an eye out for an email with your convention credentials from CANA's 102nd Cremation Innovation Convention to make sure you're in the right place at the right time. If you're not already registered, what are you waiting for?! Now, let’s take a look: enter the lobbyJust like you get your bearings at the registration desk at a CANA Convention, the Lobby is the place where you’ll start when you log in. You’ll have some pop-ups here with recommendations on how to make the most of your experience: using Google Chrome as your internet browser, connecting on a laptop or desktop, enabling notifications from the platform, connecting your microphone and camera. Say yes without any fear that this will follow you around – no one but CANA will send a notification and they’ll all be event-related. If your window looks a bit strange, try zooming your browser out in your settings. And you’re in! A video will welcome you and a public chat will show you who else is in the lobby so you can re-connect with your colleagues from far away. A posted schedule will keep you on track (remember, all times default to US Central Time so translate as appropriate), with announcements reminding you where to go next. To the left, like rooms branching off, you’ll see a list of destinations for your trip: JOIN THE CONVERSATION You’ll find public chat rooms like the one on the right in all areas of the platform. Just like you never know who you’ll bump into on the Convention floor, you’ll be able to talk to anyone visiting the room, booth, and session you’re in. Don’t be afraid to introduce yourself and let people know who you are – only other people registered for the event can see what you say here. Make sure that your profile is accurate by reviewing your Account. Include your photo so people recognize you (we recommend a 200x200 jpg, square dimensions work best). catch the speaker presentationsSessions is your doorway to all of the great content CANA has planned. Add the sessions to your schedule to be sure you get reminders when it’s starting – remember all times default to US Central Time (that's where CANA's HQ is) so you may need to translate. Locate the upcoming presentation from the list of sessions and start the Zoom event from your window (you may have to answer a CAPTCHA, so don’t miss any of those stoplights or you might miss out on some great ideas!). Our speakers were chosen for their talent and expertise at delivering fantastic ideas in an online format. Like striking up a conversation with your neighbor, there’s a public chat here, too, to share ideas with your colleagues and ask questions of the presenter live. Your seat is the best one in the house, but you won’t be glued to it – CANA knows that staring at a computer screen too long is draining, so we’ve built in breaks and activities along the way to keep you energized and engaged. LOG YOUR CE Once you’ve been watching the presentation for a little bit, a pop-up will ask you if you need continuing education credits for your license. And yes, it will do it every time. Be sure to say yes if you do, and we’ll automatically email you your transcript of all of the presentations that you attended for your records. Watch the video below for to see how to record your attendance. ATTENDING WITH COLLEAGUES These events are more fun with friends. If your whole team registered, you can re-create some of that in-person feeling by attending together. The easiest way to do that is to watch the presentations together, submitting your group's questions and comments from one user. But remember, if you and your colleagues need CEUs or want a chance to win in the Scavenger Hunt, everyone needs to log in individually, from their own computers so they don't miss those important pop-ups. Plus, you don't want to miss those one-on-one connections with your colleagues from across the nation. visit the trade showThe Exhibit Hall is where innovations meet solutions. Like you, suppliers of goods and services have been stuck at home, finding new ways to do things we never had to think about doing before. If you have a challenge, chances are one of these companies can meet it. Visit the booths, read the descriptions, and watch their videos to learn more about the company. Look for that public chat on the right side – it’s a great kind of users group to learn more about the challenges and solutions that businesses like yours can use. Plus, many booths have open group video chats to see demos, chat with the staff and other users, and more at the link in their public chat. Two things a virtual convention couldn’t re-create? The miles you walk in your less-than-comfortable professional shoes and the confusing labyrinth of booth maps. Now, the worst you’ll get is a finger tired of scrolling through the more than 60 registered booths – alphabetized so you can find exactly the supplier you want with a click of a mouse. Zip right to that business and connect! When you enter a booth, scroll to the bottom and you’ll see a list of people staffing it, simply click a name and start a private chat with them. The video below was made so that our exhibitors have their booths ready and waiting for attendees, but we'll let you take a look so you know what to expect in the exhibit hall. rack up pointsAs you explore the CANA Convention and Trade Show, you’ll have opportunities to earn points in our Scavenger Hunt. Network with our Secret Code Bearers, listen closely to the presentations, but mostly visit exhibitor booths and collect codes that track your activities. Simply enter these codes in the Gamification pop-up, and watch your rank increase (check out the video below for a walkthrough on our platform). Be one of the highest scoring participants and you have a chance to win a prize delivered to your door! NETWORK WITH COLLEAGUESCANA’s 102nd Convention and Trade Show is shaping up to be our biggest yet! That means that the Networking section is filled to bursting with friends, colleagues, strangers, future bosses, former employees, etc. This is the spot for connecting one-on-one. Scroll through the list of registrants, and find those people you want to connect with – check out the video below for a quick peek! NOTE: no, we can’t tell if they’re logged in, or if they’re already in a conversation, but you can always leave them a note by clicking Start a Chat. They’ll be notified about it when they’re available. If you’ve been chatting with someone one-on-one, you can take it to the next level and start a video chat. Simply tap “Start a Video Chat” and enable your camera and microphone. Your chat partner will be notified you picked up your end of the call and can join you with a quick click. Check out the video below for a quick walkthrough. do it all!Think you’re ready for the big time? Much like you yourself can only be in one place at a time, when you visit a new room, booth, or start a new conversation in the Virtual Convention, you leave where you were. However, power users can copy and paste the Virtual Event URL to a second (or third, or fourth…) tab or window of their browser to visit booths and network, or hold public and private chats, or anything you can dream of! get technical supportThis is new to everyone, but CANA Staff are standing by to help ease your way. If you get stuck, you can find a chat widget in CANA-gold in the lower left corner – type in your question and someone will answer. Or find a Staff member in the Networking section, any one of us can help you out. Or maybe you just want to talk it through, in which case, CANA’s phone lines are open and waiting: 312-245-1077. We can’t wait to welcome you with a handshake and a hug in Seattle next year. But until then, we’re excited to connect with you at a safe social distance with CE you need, ideas to inspire, and connection you crave. Join us virtually: https://pheedloop.com/cana20/virtual/ CANA is meeting cremation, cemetery, and funeral professionals where they are – serving their communities safely through online platforms. Exhibits, networking, education, and fun packed into two days at CANA’s Virtual Convention and Trade Show. See what you’re missing by not registering at goCANA.org/CANA20
“Offer all of the options, to every family, every time.” – Dave Daly No matter a family’s religion or cultural background, there will be times when it is appropriate for a family to see the disposition to completion, wherever it may be. When I served my first Hindu family during my internship, I was struck by the reverence, the beauty and meaning imbued in the ritual of the sendoff at the crematory. Perhaps the West Coast is unique in that many of the families we served in that region were already familiar with witness cremation, even if they did not have a religious requirement to do so. It was not until I moved back to the Midwest that I learned that so many funeral directors and consumers found the concept of going to the crematory shocking. Families’ imagination is often far worse than the reality of cremation. Many may envision a stark, cold, clinical environment that smells like a hospital. They may imagine a chamber full of flames, and that the entire process is short, lonely, and perfunctory. This is why families are less likely to ask, When will we be able to watch the cremation? as they would be to ask, When will we be able to watch the lowering of the casket into the grave? Typically, this is an offer that the funeral director poses to the family who may need time to decide if that is something they can handle. a historyFrom the late 1890s until the 1930s, the profession had invited the family to attend the cremation, as many marble-walled crematoria began to be built in Europe and North America (Jupp, 2005). Early cremationists treated the cremation ceremony in a manner virtually identical to committals. However, postwar funeral reform in the U.S. began to treat cremation as a threat to the industry, with several professional associations focusing on how to deal with the “problem of cremation.” Too many American funeral professionals determined that cremation was ugly and even our contemporary books on cremation describe witnessing ceremonies in a negative tone: “As late as 1932, the Forest Home Chapel and Crematory in Milwaukee was encouraging family members to witness the placing of the corpse in the cremation furnace” (Prothero, 2002). putting the service back in cremationIs the consumer to blame for direct cremations? Or, as a profession, have we urged families away from ceremonial cremation in the hope that families who desire more time and a chance to say goodbye will opt for casketed burial instead? It is my belief that we are doing a disservice to families who select cremation if we do not offer them an opportunity to witness their loved one being laid to rest. Most funeral directors will invite the surviving family to be present at the graveside service. Witnessing the remains being placed into the chamber is like watching a casket be lowered into the grave, but for cremation. Similarly, this event creates a lasting memorial and final farewell for the family. Offering ceremonial witness cremations to families allows a unique, hands-on experience that creates an additional opportunity for the family to gain closure in a meaningful way. When we set up a graveside service, we plan for ceremonial comforts: a tent, chairs, perhaps an ice bucket filled with bottled water and, more often than not, someone to officiate the ceremony whether this is a clergy member, celebrant, family member or the funeral director. There is a prescribed and widely accepted order to the event. To appropriately create this memory of physical separation from a loved one’s remains for our families who select cremation, we need to ask ourselves some questions and shift our own perspectives. a standard of excellenceWhen was the last time you had a client family ask for a three-day viewing in a Promethean bronze casket with limos for everyone and a plot in the highest spot in the cemetery that overlooks the lake? The fact is that we will continue to serve a growing number of cremation families in the future. Why not create a standard of excellence in your market for cremation ceremonies imbued with meaning and ritual. Regardless of the type of disposition, families want to ensure that the remains they are entrusting into your care are that of their loved one. Witness cremation ceremonies offer both an opportunity to gather in remembrance of the departed as well as rapport-building transparency with positive identification of the deceased. Families will consider your firm as more credible if you have nothing to hide, and many will want to participate in the hands-on experience of saying goodbye. Seeing their loved one right before the cremation—and potentially participating by initiating the cremation process—will help create a peace of mind, dispel fears about the process, and create greater goodwill and trust. It will allow the families you serve to recognize the permanence of death (Wolfelt, 2016). witness best practicesAs the public becomes more familiar with “do-it-yourself” and hands-on experiences, while self-educating about cremation, it makes sense to offer private crematory experiences as part of our standard services just as we include visitations and graveside ceremonies. Let’s consider the optics of practicing witness cremation ceremonies. When my mother passes, I plan on being present at the crematory to see my mother one last time. Will I be comfortable with her being cremated in a cardboard alternative container? I consider myself a pragmatist, but it would be much harder for me to select a minimum cardboard container over an alternative cremation option that comes with a pillow and is the same color as all her furniture. Even though I know, rationally, that it will be consumed during the cremation, the likelihood of upgrading my mother to a ceremonial cremation container is 100%. Even if not embalmed, setting a decedent’s features and performing a minimum preparation of remains should be planned for regardless of whether the family has expressed a desire to view the remains at the crematory. The majority of crematory operators I have worked with in the past have told me that if a family is willing to travel to the crematory, then there is a greater chance that they may wish to view the remains at the time of the cremation even if they were previously undecided about viewing. As with planning any other type of service, it is important to allot enough time and set expectations and constraints to the family, the funeral home, and the crematory. This will require clear communication between all parties involved to schedule a well-organized event. Families want a memorable and favorable experience; they do not want to feel rushed. As the families we serve become increasingly participative, including them in the planning and tone of this event lends them a greater sense of control. Survivors may opt to place special photos, letters, or trinkets into the cremation container; they may wish to have a significant song played while their loved one is being placed into the chamber. The benefits outweigh the additional time and effort spent planning the service. COMMUNICATING WITH FAMILIESFear comes from a loss of control. Not having a realistic picture of what the crematory looks like, feels like, smells like, or sounds like will cause undue stress. It is important for practitioners to help their client families understand what to expect so they will know what the outcome of the event will be and rest at ease knowing that nothing terrible will happen, like their imagination suggests. There are several opportunities to convey the value and experience of witness cremation ceremonies: wherever you explain what services you offer. This service should appear on your General Price List, under the Services tab of your website, and be addressed during the arrangement conference with every family who selects cremation. Several funeral homes have the witness cremation option built in to their cremation authorization form, where the authorizing agent will initial “Yes, we want to witness the cremation and here are the names of the people who will be present”, or “No, we would like to opt out of that ceremony.” If appropriate, a gallery of photos or YouTube video can give a sense of the crematory, so you do not have to schedule a pre-cremation tour of the space (although an open-door policy is a recommended best practice). When making funeral arrangements, a consumer may not have enough background information to understand what you are asking if you say, “Do you want to witness the cremation?” Without context, this sounds more like a threat, rather than an invitation. Over time, a funeral arranger can become more familiar with how to present witness cremation experiences by explaining the ceremony and inviting the family to be present for the event. Here’s a sample script: “The cremation will be held at our crematory, which is located at our funeral home and cemetery on the northside. There, your mother will be held until the day and time that the cremation will occur. Our crematory allows for immediate family to be present to watch the cremation container be placed into the cremator. We welcome you to be present for one last goodbye in your mother’s send-off, which is completely optional. If you are interested in this, please initial here on the cremation authorization where it says, ‘Yes, family present.’ I will contact the crematory operator to schedule a time. I will be there with you by your side and if you wish to start the cremation process, you have the option of pushing the button.” Whether your crematory space is “industrial,” or built specifically to host families for witness ceremonies, managing that expectation is key. Would heavy rain deter you from attending the graveside of your spouse or parent? If not, then a “no-frills” functional crematory space should not be a deterrent for a family, but having a weather forecast and knowing ahead of time to bring rain boots is always appreciated. In an ideal world, every family who selects cremation would be present to see their loved one. If that were the case, the chances of an erroneous cremation would be nearly impossible. Realistically, the percent of families who choose to be present at the graveside to see the casket lowered is likely what you can expect of families to witness cremations. As with a burial or any ceremony in funeral service, there must be an order of events to ensure a smooth cremation. Funeral directors must partner with crematory operators and schedule times for witnesses at the crematory’s discretion (e.g., “The crematory operator says that we can plan the witness ceremony on Tuesday at 1:00 pm. Does that work for your family?”). overcoming concernsIf you have a distrusting family who does not want to “receive someone else’s ashes”, crematory experiences are the solution. You can collaborate with the crematory operator to allow the family to be present for the transfer of their loved one’s cremated remains to the urn, giving the family a greater sense of trust and peace of mind. It is critical to coordinate the scheduling with the crematory. It may make sense to hold the witness cremation as the last one of the day and schedule the pickup of the urn for first thing in the morning; this gives the crematory operator ample time for overnight cooling and an additional opportunity for the family to watch the identification process post-cremation. Many funeral service providers may be reluctant to offer witness cremation ceremonies because it is more work. But you would be surprised by the number of “direct cremation” families who are ready and willing to see their loved one, they just did not know it was an option. We don’t know what we don’t know. It doesn’t hurt or cost anything to ask those you serve if they want to press a button, place the cremation casket into the chamber, insert a letter or drawing from a child in the cremation container, or order flowers when they see a photo of an all-concrete crematory space. Giving the consumer a say in the cremation service helps add value to the experience. It offers another opportunity to mourn and be together in a difficult time. Plenty of funeral homes routinely ask the family if they want to see the lowering of the casket during a graveside service. Why not start with witness cremation ceremonies? Heather Braatz takes a deep dive into "Witness Cremation Ceremonies" at CANA's Virtual Cremation Convention on August 5. The session will focus on differentiating your cremation business by providing witness cremation choices to families and practical guidance on how to add value through ceremony. See what else CANA has planned and register at goCANA.org/CANA2
GRIEF CAN'T WAIT: 5 STRATEGIES TO ENGAGE YOUR COMMUNITY VIRTUALLY DURING SOCIAL DISTANCING6/17/2020
Lately, we’ve all had to reassess the way we do things. Talking to people in your community is different now that most of it isn’t done face-to-face. Fortunately, you can still make meaningful connections, just a in a new way. We must now lean more heavily than ever on technology to connect with our communities. During social distancing, the ways you used to engage and connect with your families don’t always work, but you know grieving families need your support now more than ever. Grief just can’t wait, and families need you as a guide. As a funeral director, you’re already a problem solver, so think about lending support to those grieving in a way you never have before. Think differently, and think digitally. Here are five strategies to engage your community virtually during social distancing so you can continue to serve your families in an effective and valuable way. 1. Host Virtual EventsIf events were part of your marketing outreach before the pandemic, make them part of your efforts now, too. Just make them digital. When you plan digital events, thinking outside the box goes a long way. We’ve seen a number of firms use digital events to engage with their community and keep their outreach going. For instance, you can use inexpensive apps to engage your community online. You can learn more about how Guam Windward Memorial did just that in this interview using digital scavenger hunts coupled with community bingo sessions. These fun-focused events engage your community and highlight your brand rather than directly marketing preneed or at-need services. When creating virtual events focused on engagement, spend a little time brainstorming things your community likes to do and how you can create a digital space to come together around those things. It could be a sport, a community landmark, or a recurring community event like a parade. If you are ready to dive back into preneed events, hosting digital ones provides an opportunity to personalize your education more than you did in the past. When you host an in-person preneed event, most firms need to reach a broad audience for better attendance since in-person events take more resources (cost, set up, time, etc.) than digital ones. However, when hosting a virtual preneed event using a video conference call, like Zoom, less prep is required so you can hyper-focus your event. Consider promoting events specifically catering to the needs of a target audience: veterans, religious groups, recent widows or widowers, or any other specific group in your community. Personalization like this has been proven more effective because people feel you are speaking directly to them and meeting their specific need. Thus, hosting smaller, highly targeted video events increases your chance of winning these individuals over. 2. NEW WAYS FOR PEOPLE TO CONNECT: |
Heather McWilliams Mierzejewski brings marketing and additional writing expertise to the Funeral Innovations team. She previously covered breaking news, politics, and religion for print, digital and radio news outlets before slipping journalism’s tentacles and diving into the digital marketing world. She spent the past 3+ years at a digital advertising agency working on marketing and content solutions for adidas, Reebok, and Chipotle among other brands. When not on the prowl for killer marketing stories, Heather spends time with her active kids and rides her bike on the Colorado byways. She’s always looking for new riding buddies. |
Julie A. Burn is a cremation specialist with over 28 years of experience in the funeral profession. She has served as the director of cremation services for StoneMor Partners and the International Cemetery, Cremation and Funeral Association and as the manager of cremation services for Wilbert Funeral Services. Burn served on the board of directors for the Cremation Association of North America from 2000-2003, and currently serves as a consultant to CANA on their educational online training program. Julie holds the designation of Certified Cremation Executive and Certified Supplier Executive and is a Certified Celebrant. |
Rhonda Montgomery, Ph.D. is the Department Chair of the Food & Beverage and Event Management Department in the William F. Harrah College of Hotel Administration. She conducts research and has written articles on the social psychology of purchasing decisions and customer loyalty for meetings, conventions and festivals. She has also written numerous books in the areas of meetings and conventions, private club management and the first-year experience. |
Rhonda Montgomery, Ph.D. is the Department Chair of the Food & Beverage and Event Management Department in the William F. Harrah College of Hotel Administration. She conducts research and has written articles on the social psychology of purchasing decisions and customer loyalty for meetings, conventions and festivals. She has also written numerous books in the areas of meetings and conventions, private club management and the first-year experience. |
Cremation experts share the latest news, trends, and creative advice for industry professionals. Register or log in to subscribe and stay engaged with all things cremation.
All
Aftercare
Alkaline Hydrolysis
Arranging
Body Preparation
Business Planning
Celebrants
Cemetery
Communication
Consumers
Covid19
Cremation Specialists
Education
Embalming
Events
Green Practices
Grief
Guest Post
History
Hr
Inspiration
Installation
Leadership
Manufacturers
Marketing
Memorialization
Personalization
Pets
Preplanning
Processes And Procedures
Professional Development
Public Relations
Safety
Selfcare
Services
Statistics
Storytelling
Suppliers
Technology
Tips And Tools
Transportation
February 2025
January 2025
December 2024
November 2024
October 2024
September 2024
August 2024
July 2024
June 2024
May 2024
April 2024
March 2024
February 2024
January 2024
December 2023
November 2023
October 2023
September 2023
August 2023
July 2023
June 2023
May 2023
April 2023
March 2023
February 2023
January 2023
December 2022
November 2022
October 2022
September 2022
August 2022
July 2022
June 2022
May 2022
April 2022
March 2022
February 2022
January 2022
December 2021
November 2021
October 2021
September 2021
August 2021
July 2021
June 2021
May 2021
April 2021
March 2021
February 2021
January 2021
December 2020
November 2020
October 2020
September 2020
August 2020
July 2020
June 2020
May 2020
April 2020
March 2020
February 2020
January 2020
December 2019
November 2019
October 2019
September 2019
August 2019
July 2019
June 2019
May 2019
April 2019
March 2019
February 2019
January 2019
December 2018
November 2018
October 2018
September 2018
August 2018
July 2018
June 2018
May 2018
April 2018
March 2018
February 2018
January 2018
December 2017
November 2017
October 2017
September 2017
August 2017
July 2017
June 2017
May 2017
April 2017
March 2017
|